Grace and Good Coffee

Finding grace and good coffee to survive every day.

You are here: Home / Archives for spiritual health

spiritual health

Compassion International: Hope Starts with You.

by

I’ve been thinking a lot about what my next blog post should be, following the story of how I lost my Mama just before Christmas. No matter what topic came to mind, nothing seemed right to say because my heart is still broken. It’s hard to move on; it’s hard to talk about anything normal anymore. Everything else just seems so trivial compared to our “forever” journeys.

Even though Mama’s departure was so beautifully orchestrated, with my sister and I by her side, she’s still gone from my life here. There are still days when I’m on the floor wondering if this is real or just a horrible dream. I don’t understand why I’m parentless already, and how my 2-year old daughter will grow up never having the joy of knowing her grandparents.

I just can’t fix my broken heart. Only Jesus can do that.

But there are still things I CAN do. I can continue to live with a greater purpose outside of myself. I can still give hope to others in need. I may be heartbroken, but I can still be the change I wish to see in the world.

So let me share with you a better Christmas story from 2018.

My local church hosted a Christmas concert by Michael W. Smith that year, and I was SO excited to go with my husband. Michael did not disappoint; there was a packed house, and it was a beautiful show!

During a portion of the concert, Michael W. Smith shared his experience as a Compassion International sponsor, and his story brought me to tears. I immediately knew that David and I were meant to become sponsors for a child in need. When the time came, I raised my hand for a sponsor packet, and God gave us a boy in the Philippines as our first Compassion child.

Being his sponsor has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. He blesses us more than we could have ever blessed him. We have shared letters and cards, and we get to watch him grow up, while helping to provide him with the basic needs that every kid should have. I love that Compassion not only fills their bellies, but their spirits as well. These children are connected with churches and people to help them grow and break free from poverty. Compassion is a beautiful organization, and I am SO glad we found them.

Today I felt a God-nudge to sponsor another child in need. We were connected with a 5-year old girl in Africa who lives in an HIV/AIDS affected area, and is considered high risk for exploitation. She’s been waiting for a sponsor for over a year; as of today, she has us.

If you feel the love in your heart for these children as I do, all you have to do is cancel one family restaurant meal each month to be a blessing to them. $38 a month is all it takes. Please, be the change. Hope starts with you; help a child in need today.

Blessings,
Emily

the day Mama went Home.

by

December 20, 2019.

~Reading scripture to Mama~

The hospice center was filled with the brightest sunlight we had seen in the last 5 days. A guitarist began to play beautiful acoustic music right across the hall from my mother’s room. My mama, who had always carried a deep love of music within her heart, was being serenaded and beckoned by the Almighty. It was so beautiful that I powered off the thermostat so she could hear it more clearly.

I spoke gently to Mama, reassuring her that I would take care of my sister and handle anything I thought she might be worried about. And for the first time in 5 days, I felt absolutely sure that I wanted to be there when her soul entered the Kingdom of Heaven. I told her so, and also made sure she knew that my sister would want to be there with her too. Just as I finished up the last of countless chats I’d had with Mama over the past week, my sister returned from the hospice kitchen and sat down on the other side of Mama’s bed.

It had been 5 days since Mama left ICU to be transferred to the hospice center; 5 miserable, long, tortured days of watching her “sleep” while telling her how much we loved her, how proud we were of her for fighting so hard for so long, how sorry we were that she had suffered so much, and how thankful we were for her and the gift of every moment we had shared together in our lifetimes.

It was incredibly hard not to hear her sweet voice responding or see her beautiful eyes gazing back at us as we spoke to her throughout that week, but we had been repeatedly assured by the medical staff that she could hear everything we said. So, we spent every day saying our “see you later’s” knowing that according to the doctor, she should not survive another hour, let alone another night. And then we’d wake up in awe each morning once we discovered she was still with us, still fighting.

But this morning was different. Her breathing was more labored than in the previous days, and I could sense a change happening. There seemed to be less of her there; less of her spirit was trapped inside the sick body that had held her captive with cancer for nearly 3 years. There was more of her elsewhere now, than in this hospice bed.

The guitarist played on, strumming the most beautiful selection of songs — hymns, Christmas songs, and old southern favorites that brought back wonderful memories. I heard several of Mama’s favorites, and I knew she was listening and smiling over us. As the music filled the air around us, I suddenly felt an urging to tell my sister that Mama’s time was near so she would be prepared. I knew in my heart that her transformation would soon be complete.

Then, just minutes after I had spoken those words, an old familiar guitar tune fell on our ears. The song immediately grabbed my sister’s attention, because it’s about dancing — something Mama had longed to be able to do again. My sister began humming the tune, and filled in the words once it reached the chorus:

“Dance, then, wherever you may be,
I am the Lord of the dance, said he,
And I’ll lead you all, wherever you may be,
And I’ll lead you all in the dance, said he...”

My sister looked down at our mother, touched her hand, and said, “Now you can dance again, Mama.” And at that moment, Mama took her last breath and saw the face of God.

In that instant, I saw Mama’s spirit leave her broken body; I knew right away that she was finally free. And thru my tears of both sadness and joy, I thanked Mama for fighting so hard and for waiting for us to be okay before leaving. I also thanked God for the gift He gave of allowing us to witness that moment and feel Heaven in that hospice room.

It was the most beautiful, unimagined ending to Mama’s long and faithful fight. What an incredible blessing it was to experience such a heavenly event. We had been given the gift of closure, knowing that Mama was alive and well in Heaven — perfect and whole in every way.

“Dance, then, wherever you may be,
I am the Lord of the dance, said he,
And I’ll lead you all, wherever you may be,
And I’ll lead you all in the dance, said he...”

Blessings,
Emily

gratitude

by

I like to start my blogs the same way I would if I were picking up a conversation with an old friend. “It’s me again! Let me tell you about today…” But in reality, sometimes it’s been a while in between conversations, and if you’re not really good friends, it might seem a little awkward. Nevertheless, I have a hankering to talk about something today, so cheers to the awkwardness ensuing.

Photo credit: Emily Hunsaker

It’s officially October, so we’re quickly approaching the season of gratitude. You know, the couple of months out of the year when we’re forced to think about all the things we’re supposed to be thankful for, even though we’re still annoyed with everyday life.

It feels something like this:
I’m still working all the time.
I’m still just as exhausted as ever.
I’m still overweight.
I’m still stressed out.
I’m still not “living my best life” … *insert eye-roll here*

You know what? You don’t have to fall into that trap. “Living your best life” does not mean you’re expected to live out someone else’s highlight reel. Forget that staged mess! Life is dirty and stressful and downright MEAN sometimes.

Living your best life might just mean being thankful for the 3 things that didn’t hit the fan today, and dragging your butt out of bed on purpose tomorrow to do it all over again, because there are people who need you to do that.

And honey, that kind of gratitude these days is my kind of gratitude.

We all know the reality is that most of us are able to get ourselves wherever we need to go, feed ourselves when we’re hungry, work to pay our bills, and even jump into a whole heap of trouble every day if we feel like it — and I usually do. Sigh.

When I can actually pause to think about the word “gratitude” on purpose, I quickly realize that I have a LOT to be thankful for. I may not be a spring chicken anymore, but I can still do most of the things that I’ve always been able to do. And thank goodness for that, because I have a toddler who likes to keep me on my toes!

But on most days when I don’t have time to sit and think about it, I’ll just keep whispering, “Thank you Jesus for my coffee. Amen.“

What can you be grateful for today?

Blessings,
Emily

because He lives.

by

Life has been anything but easy over the last month or so.

I have thought many times about what my next blog post should be, what I should share, what I should leave out… I have started to write so many times, and just didn’t have the energy, or the focus, or the time to do it justice.

Tonight is much the same, but I heard an old familiar song start to play in my mind earlier, and it brought me comfort. I wanted to share this song with y’all, in case someone else needs to hear it too. I pray that it gives you the peace you need to face any trial in your path.

When I am able, I’ll write more. Until then… 

Because He Lives:

 God sent His Son, they called him Jesus,
 He came to love, heal and forgive;
 He lived and died, to buy my pardon,
 An empty grave is there to prove my Savior lives.

 Because He lives, I can face tomorrow,
 Because He lives, all fear is gone;
 Because I know He holds the future,
 And life is worth the living just because He lives.

 How sweet to hold a newborn baby,
 And feel the pride, and joy he gives;
 But greater still the calm assurance,
 This child can face uncertain days because He lives.

 Because He lives, I can face tomorrow,
 Because He lives, all fear is gone;
 Because I know He holds the future,
 And life is worth the living just because He lives.

 And then one day I'll cross the river,
 I'll fight life's final war with pain;
 And then as death gives way to victory,
 I'll see the lights of glory and I'll know He lives.

 Because He lives, I can face tomorrow,
 Because He lives, all fear is gone;
 Because I know He holds the future,
 And life is worth the living just because He lives.

Blessings,
Emily

joy in waiting

by

For the past few weekends, I have taken joy in waiting for my morning coffee.

I add the aromatic scoops of goodness to my french press, boil some water, stir it all together with a wooden spoon, and set my timer for 10 minutes of waiting – anticipating the best coffee I’ve had all week. It has quickly become a treasured tradition in my Saturday and Sunday morning routine.

In the background, my daughter is playing and running around our living room with joyful abandon, oftentimes needing Mama’s attention or help… and although I’m not quite “awake” yet, I still wait with joy, knowing the promise of what is to come. After just a few minutes of brewing, the rich smell wafts into the room where we’re playing together, and it brings a smile to my face.

In a world overrun by impatience and the longing for instant gratification, my french press reminds me that the best things in life can’t be rushed. We must wait for many things, and it’s not always as easy as Saturday morning coffee.

We work hard, we stress, we need some things to be easy, and we struggle when they aren’t. Waiting for the fasting window to end, waiting to lose weight, waiting in traffic when we’re already late, waiting for someone to text us back, waiting for test results, waiting for a paycheck when we’ve got bills to pay, etc. It’s not hard to see why “waiting” has a bad rep. Sometimes we find ourselves waiting for really big things like love, children, forgiveness, reconciliation, or healing.

Unfortunately, waiting is rarely joyful.

But what if we could lean on God’s promises in the waiting? What if we thought of Him as the ultimate barista in charge of the french press that’s brewing our coffee, trusting Him to know when it’s ready? If we could do that, could we take JOY in the waiting?

We live in a world full of uncertainties and naysayers who try to suck the joy out of our lives, but here’s what they don’t want you to know: we don’t have to subscribe to the negativity.

We can CHOOSE JOY – even in the waiting.

The feeling you get when you hug a close friend. The sound of the birds singing in the morning. Someone holding a door for a stranger. The stories you hear of hope and healing. The comfort you find in talking with a fellow believer about His promises. The Truth in His Word. Think on these things; look for and focus on the joy that’s all around us.

No matter where you are in your journey right now, you can choose to take joy in the waiting.

Take comfort in His Word, and carry it with you like a light unto your path:

Matthew 5: 1-16, from The Message (MSG) Bible

You’re Blessed:
1-2 When Jesus saw his ministry drawing huge crowds, he climbed a hillside. Those who were apprenticed to him, the committed, climbed with him. Arriving at a quiet place, he sat down and taught his climbing companions. This is what he said:
3 “You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule.
4 “You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.
5 “You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are—no more, no less. That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought.
6 “You’re blessed when you’ve worked up a good appetite for God. He’s food and drink in the best meal you’ll ever eat.
7 “You’re blessed when you care. At the moment of being ‘care-full,’ you find yourselves cared for.
8 “You’re blessed when you get your inside world—your mind and heart—put right. Then you can see God in the outside world.
9 “You’re blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That’s when you discover who you really are, and your place in God’s family.
10 “You’re blessed when your commitment to God provokes persecution. The persecution drives you even deeper into God’s kingdom.
11-12 “Not only that—count yourselves blessed every time people put you down or throw you out or speak lies about you to discredit me. What it means is that the truth is too close for comfort and they are uncomfortable. You can be glad when that happens—give a cheer, even!—for though they don’t like it, I do! And all heaven applauds. And know that you are in good company. My prophets and witnesses have always gotten into this kind of trouble.

Salt and Light:
13 “Let me tell you why you are here. You’re here to be salt-seasoning that brings out the God-flavors of this earth. If you lose your saltiness, how will people taste godliness? You’ve lost your usefulness and will end up in the garbage.
14-16 “Here’s another way to put it: You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We’re going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don’t think I’m going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I’m putting you on a light stand. Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven.

Blessings,
Emily

weeds

by

They get into every yard, invading a perfectly beautiful lawn atwill. They’re resilient, appearing to survive droughts much better than most grass. You can spend hours upon hours trying to get rid of them; it’s nearly a fulltime job. And HOAs don’t like them.

I know this because we’ve received letters (yes, plural) telling us that we’re in violation of an “article” within the bylaws, because of weeds in our yard. The last letter I opened from the HOA threatened us with a “board hearing and fines”. I remember it very well because we received it just after returning home from visiting my mother, who has been battling cancer for 2 years now and the cancer is still just as arrogant and unrelenting as ever – much like the weeds in my yard.

After temporarily losing my put-togetherness over a letter addressing the most trivial mess I’ve ever read (especially while still reeling over the sight of my frail mother), I consulted a few of my level-headed friends to get some unbiased perspective. They all said the same thing: “You have more important things to worry about than a few weeds, or letters about weeds.” After seeing the letter, one friend in particular asked me if my weeds were 3-feet tall — HAHA! I assured her that they aren’t, and they never have been. To which she replied, “Then that letter is CRAZY.”

And I agree.

The “weeds” in my life are much bigger and scarier than the weeds in my lawn, or any threats an HOA could throw at me.

But when did the world become so incredibly petty? When did our biggest concern (and point of harassment) become weeds in our lawns?

I once heard a pastor say that our souls expand and shrink to size of our concerns.

Read that again, and let it simmer for a minute.

If we are constantly fixated on “small” things, our souls shrink and become small. If our souls’ burdens are big, they expand to the size of those concerns – we grow. So if we are more concerned with things that affect more than just ourselves and our own lives, our souls have grown. (Keeping in mind that our souls can grow and yet shrink again, if we get all wrapped up in ourselves and don’t have any regard for others or things that are happening outside of our circles.)

My mama is hurting, so I am hurting. It’s hard for me to see past what she is going through, long enough to focus on anything smaller than cancer. I wish and pray for many things, but mostly for her healing. She has so much life left to live, and I will do everything I can to help her live it. That’s about as much as my soul can carry right now.

What I won’t do, is worry about some dang weeds.

If any of you are looking for a place to expand your soul and give, consider St. Jude. They are my absolute favorite charity. Did you know that families who receive care from St. Jude don’t pay for a single thing while they are there?

I have my Amazon account set up to give a small portion of each purchase to St. Jude’s, via https://smile.amazon.com. It’s free and easy to do. If you haven’t already, give it a try! 😊

You can also donate to the #ChipInChallenge for St Jude, which is currently taking place via https://magnolia.com/chipinchallenge.

Of course, soul-stretching isn’t just about giving from your wallet. You can also give of your time, your skills, your blood, your sweat, etc., to help others in any way that you are able.

For goodness’ sake, whatever you do – stay out of the weeds. 😉

Blessings,
Emily

Image by Bruno /Germany